Ultimate Rookie Report Week 15

QBs keep breaking this year. It feels like anyone who is tossing the pigskin has gotten hurt at some point. There have been 54 different starting quarterbacks in the NFL this season and we still have 4 weeks to go. Fun Fact: The record for broken quarterbacks was set last year at 68. Hopefully you’ve managed to avoid the injury bug as a fantasy manager, and if you have, buy a lottery ticket.  Or play in the playoffs and sneer at the rest of us scrambling to fill the most important spot on the roster. 

These rookies scored points this week.

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5. Bijan Robinson (19.8)

It’s always nice to have a Bijan sighting here. He had a criminally low 10 carries (almost split evenly with Tyler Allgeier. Gross.) for 34 yards and a touchdown. Bijan also caught five passes for 54 yards.

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4. Zay Flowers  (20)

My personal ride or die this season is cranking it up just in time for me to miss the playoffs. Six catches, 60 yards, and an octopus (touchdown and the two point conversion) was Zay’s stat line.

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3. Jayden Reed (20.5)

Monday Night Football had two different games this week and both were WILD. Tyjae Spears (8), Tommy DeVito (9) and Will Levis (11) all had great showings on national tv. However, the best rookie of the night was Green Bay Packer Jayden Reed. Reed caught eight out of ten targets for 27 yards but also had four carries for 38 yards and a touchdown. Reed has become Jordan Love’s new favorite weapon and should squeeze into your playoff lineup if you have him.

(Numbers in parentheses here are what they would be ranked on the rookie list if it extended that far.)

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2. Brandon Aubrey (22)

A kicker? Yes. A kicker. Get over it. This guy has been a game changer all year long and the best kept secret not on your roster. Aubrey kicked  45,  50,  59, and 60 yard field goals this week. He also kicked three extra points. This was an absolutely stunning performance from a position nobody gives a kick about. 

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1. Jake Browning (23.7)

My wife asked if there would be a quarterback controversy in Cincinnati next year and I laughed at her. Jake Browning is good, but he’s no Joe Burrow. He will be a nice trade piece in the offseason though. Against the Colts, Browning was 18/24 on his passes for 275 yards and two touchdowns. There was an interception, too, but who’s counting? Browning has had back to back great performances filling in for Burrow and has put the Bengals solidly into the playoff hunt. Browning was QB4 overall this week based on his points.

Fantasy playoffs are starting so congratulations and good luck to everyone who needs it! I wish extra luck to anyone fighting not to have a dumb punishment for being the worst. Unfortunately, I’m a mush, so I probably just jinxed you.

If you want to share your league’s loser punishment I would love to hear it. X me or tweet or do whatever it’s called now in Elon’s “free speech” hellscape. 

Much love,

@MeLlamoMoron

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