Why I Hate CFB National Signing Day

We did it America, once again we made it through another National Signing Day, for those of you outside the U.S. (and I’m sorry for that, living here is great) National Signing Day is a day when we give over-privileged high school football players 15 minutes of fame for them to go on ESPN and choose what college they’re going to go to.  This used to be done in the privacy of the high school principal’s office with maybe the local paper and if you’re really hot shit the school paper for the college you’re signing with.  But now, oh my god, now ESPN shoves a fucking camera in their faces and these immature pimple poppers and, of course, these teens are going to act like total douchebags, so without further ado, and of course don’t take this completely seriously, I don’t mean it completely literally (except when I do), but here is why I hate National Signing Day.

ESPN:  My disdain for ESPN is well documented on this site and probably elsewhere on the interwebs, but I think their biggest trespass against sports is shoving a camera in a 17-18-year-olds face.  Teenagers are the worst.  I know every old person thinks that, but look back on your years as a teenager, go ahead I’ll wait, if you’re old like Geoff this may take some time, but you were a terrible person and so was I.  So ESPN shoves a camera in their face and all of a sudden they think they’re the best, and they’re not and think that they’re LeBron James and this is the decision.  If this self-absorbed world of Instagram, twitter, and Facebook wasn’t bad enough but we shove the national media in these kids’ faces and of course they act douche.

The Kids: Like I said above teenagers are the worst and if you put them in front of a television camera and they instantly become a slobbering reality star and they think the world revolves around them.  Every year these teens try to outdo the previous year’s signing day, of course, this trend really became a craze when Antonio Logan-El in a Baltimore ESPN Zone was all but set to commit to Maryland when he swerved the Terp filled the bar and chose Penn State by tossing away the Maryland hat.  Of course, we not get kids trying to top this with paintball choosing, putting hats of schools to get them excited and then tossing them aside in favor of the actual school they are going to attend.  And maybe worst of all is the tale of Kevin Hart (and no not the midget comedian) a kid from Nevada who held a big signing day hat ceremony at his school.  The chooses came down to Oregon and Cal.  Hart chose Cal.  One problem, though, neither Cal nor Oregon offered him a scholarship, he made it all up just for the attention.  I can’t fully blame the kids because kids are dumb, so maybe some of the blame should sit with…

The Parents:  Most kids learn how to act in public from their parents.  Douchebags usually breed more douchebags, so some of these parent stories don’t surprise me at all.  There are a few of kids committing to a school and parents forging their own child’s signature and sending it to the school they wanted the kid to go to.  Let that sink in, a parent forging their child’s signature and sending it off to the school the kid did not want to go to.  The worst of all might be the tale of April Justin and her two sons Landon Collins and Gerald Willis.  The former committed to Alabama and the latter to Florida and mama bear was not pleased with her son’s decisions at all.  Apparently she’s an LSU Tiger fan, words can not do justice to just the awkwardness and embarrassment this diva of a mother caused for her sons, seriously bitch, this is your children’s moment, and unlike a lot of kids mentioned on this list they did it respectfully with a lot of consideration and pride and you go and fuck it up.  You think she would have learned the first time, but nope.  Hopefully, if she has more sons (probably all with different last names) she’ll show more decorum or they’ll pick LSU.  But I’ll just let you watch below.

The Fans:  I’ve said this before in many forums, College fans, especially football ones are the worst.  One of my favorite examples is the Bama fan who called into a radio station and repeatedly called Cam Newton “Scam” Newton and admitted to poisoning a 100-plus-year-old tree at Auburn, one that students loved, and I could tell by how this mouth breather talked that not only had he never attended Alabama but probably didn’t make it past the 8th grade.  This type of person makes up most of the collegiate fan base.  Most of the fans have never step foot on the campus of the school they root for and put an unbelievable amount of pressure on kids and threaten them when they screw up or threaten and berate opposing players.  Yes, I said teenagers are the worst, but they’re still kids, they’re still learning how to be an acceptable person and these ravenous fans are not helping when it comes to shaping them.  These fans show up at signing days and boo kids if they don’t pick their school and if that kid’s eventual team plays the school they didn’t pick these fans are ruthless towards the kid.  It’s also these fans who have created this monster that is National Signing Day if no one tuned in then it wouldn’t be shown.  ESPN is a business and they’re not going to devote time and money towards something no one watches (which scares me because Skip Bayless is still on the air which means most of you mouth breathers out there watch him, fuck you).

The Outcomes:  Most of the time these big signings don’t amount to a superstar.  Why?  Because kids develop differently, so that kid that dominated in high school (big fish in a small pond) doesn’t produce right away they’re booed out the school (this happens more than it should).   After all, if they’re not redshirted they’re competing against older, bigger, and stronger athletes in a much bigger pond where they’re all of a sudden not the big fish anymore.  They were the most gifted kid in their county going against kids who are only on the team so the school could have enough players to have a team, of course, they’re going to look like gods, but then you put them in big money programs against other big fish and all of a sudden they look very mortal.  National Signing Day is a farce that puts way too much pressure on kids and like most kids when they’re told they’re great and they fail they quit because they believe the boos and hate in college as much as they believed the cheers and adulation in high school.

So that is why I Hate National Signing Day, you can disagree with me, but I’d like you to know you’re wrong and I hate you.  However, if you’d like to know more about me, and why wouldn’t you, you can follow me on the Twitter (as well as wish me a happy birthday) @jomac006 or learn about my awesome writing career here , pick up my books at Amazon, check out my nerdy website Clash of the Nerds, and lastly if you’re a fine lady you should swipe right on Tinder.

ATTN Dynasty Commissioners: Do you want to do something cool for your league? How about a 1-hour live show dedicated to YOUR league? Team-by-team breakdowns, rankings, and more. For details and to book a show, visit: GoingFor2.com/plp.

The GoingFor2 Live Podcast